What Fathers and Mothers Can Give Their Children

By Al Felder

“A good man leaveth an inheritance to his children’s children” (Proverbs 13:22).

Parents have a profound impact on their children—and that influence can reach generations beyond what we can see. There may come a time when we feel as if we have nothing left to offer. Our children are grown. They have children of their own. But the truth is this: what godly parents can give never truly runs out. Even after children leave home, a father and mother can still shape lives—by the inheritance they leave behind.

And that inheritance is not primarily money or possessions. The most valuable inheritance parents can pass down is godly living.

An inheritance can bless—or corrupt—generations

One man’s influence can echo far into the future. If you walk the streets of Shrewsbury, England, you will find memorials to a man whose ideas shaped the modern world—Charles Darwin. His teaching proposed a view of life that removes God from the center and leaves humanity to decide right and wrong on its own.

When people are taught there is no God, they are also taught there is no absolute authority. The result is predictable: moral relativism, confusion about what is right, and a society that increasingly makes its own rules.

That’s why the question matters: What impact will you have? What will your children—and your children’s children—inherit from you?

1) The first gift: time

The number one thing parents can give their children is time. This is the foundation that every other blessing rests upon. If parents are uncommitted to spending time with their children, they will not be able to instill the virtues found in God’s word in their children.

Timothy is a powerful example. Paul spoke of the sincere faith that first lived in Timothy’s grandmother, Lois, and his mother, Eunice (2 Timothy 1:5). Behind that verse lies an apparent reality: Timothy’s faith did not arise in a vacuum. It was nurtured by family investment—by time spent teaching him who he should be.

Children are like a blank canvas. They absorb what surrounds them. They study ways of living, behaving, and thinking. If parents fail to be there—to model and teach—society will gladly fill the gap.

And parental time has a significant influence. Research has shown that the most substantial impact on a child’s decisions regarding risky behavior is the parent-child relationship. But the more profound truth is what drives that influence: not just rules, not just words—connection. A child needs to feel that he belongs in the home, that he is appreciated, loved, and affirmed.

That kind of connection cannot be produced without time.

Many families fall into a trap: they race to provide “stuff.” Toys, clothes, money, entertainment, and nonstop activities. But what children often need more than anything is steady and straightforward presence—undivided attention.

Turn off the distractions. Put down the devices. Slow down enough to know your children—and let them know you.

2) The second gift: a desire for God’s word

If time is the foundation, then spiritual appetite is one of the most important fruits that grows from it. Parents must give children a desire for God’s word—and that desire must be cultivated early.

A simple illustration makes the point. One staple of the Australian diet is a black paste called Vegemite. Many Americans can hardly tolerate it. But Australians often love it—and why? Because their mothers feed it to them early, they acquire a taste for it.

Spiritual appetite works the same way. If we want our children to crave the word of God, we must feed them the word of God from an early age.

God’s command is clear: “Thou shalt teach them diligently unto thy children… when thou sittest in thine house… when thou walkest by the way… when thou liest down… when thou risest up” (Deuteronomy 6:7). That means Bible teaching is not occasional—it is woven into everyday life. Talk about Scripture. Please read it to them. Let them see you reading it. Make God’s word part of the regular rhythm of the home.

Along with that desire, parents must instill another vital truth: God’s word is our complete and sole authority in life.

This authority is challenged daily, and one of the most common tactics is attacking the beginning—casting doubt on creation and the origin of man. But if children are trained to distrust the Bible at the beginning, they will soon distrust the Bible everywhere else—morality, salvation, judgment, and truth itself.

A solid foundation must be built. The Bible must be the central starting point around which beliefs and convictions revolve. And if parents do not transmit this knowledge of God to the next generation, it will be lost.

3) The third gift: protection and defense

Parents must also be a defense for their children. Popular culture is not neutral. It is competing with your sons and daughters and is devoted to undermining godly living and traditional values. It is a constant attack.

So how do parents defend their children?

Defense through restraint

Limit excess media. Limit entertainment overload. Reduce exposure to the world’s voice so that your voice—and God’s word—can be heard more clearly. Children need less time under worldly influence and more time under godly influence.

Defense through discipline and boundaries

God’s word is direct: “Withhold not correction from the child” (Proverbs 23:13). When children are young, they need clear borders around behavior, movement, language, and attitude. As they grow, some borders shift to give increasing responsibility. But other boundaries must remain—and some must even be reinforced because children will push against them.

Teenagers may try to manipulate with complaints like, “You don’t trust me.” They may act as if boundaries are cruel. But deep down, children recognize something true: boundaries are proof of love.

Curfews say, “Someone wants you safe.”Correction says, “Your character matters.”Rules say, “You belong here, and this home has order.”

And those boundaries train children to set their own. They teach what is acceptable and unacceptable, good and bad, wise and foolish.

The conclusion: children need their parents

Children are easily influenced. They can be “tossed to and fro” by every new idea and every persuasive voice. That is why they need their parents—not just as providers, but as spiritual anchors.

Children need time. Children need attention. Children need affection. Children need approval. And children need parents who will give them a godly inheritance that reaches beyond their lifetime.